Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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