Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
