i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Randomize
