I just pynch a tree in the face
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
4 words: hood of his car
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
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