i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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