What a fucking waste of an outfit
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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