Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
