He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
