Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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