why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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