This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
