Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
