So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize