I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
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