Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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