well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize