im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
