when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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