You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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