whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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