So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Randomize
