He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize