fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Two words: blizzard sex
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Randomize
