did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
