There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
We're too hungover to prance.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
So vagazzling was a success
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
