sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Randomize
