life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
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