Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
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