put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
it's great music for shaving your balls
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
