Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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