I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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