I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
