i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize