New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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