You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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