I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize