I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Randomize
