i can't believe i had my finger in that
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
