ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize