Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
