i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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