I need help removing her.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Randomize
