i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
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I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
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I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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