She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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