My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
You may now shotgun with the bride
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
The feeling are messing with the penis
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
