He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
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