look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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