and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
