i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
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