i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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