Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
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