i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different